Transcript
Hey, this is Carl from Chicago, and my question is about toddler tantrums. My son is two and a half years old and he’s started really hating his high chair and just yells a lot during meal times. What can I do to help him eat or stop yelling as much?
Hey Carl, thanks so much for being a Dad’s Club member. It’s great to have you here. That’s a really great question about toddler tantrums during mealtime, my wife and I are definitely experiencing this with our daughter Lily as well.
Dr. Bernard-Bonnin from the University of Montreal, who specializes in pediatrics, said that ignoring negative mealtime behaviors like tantrums and throwing food, and instead of praising positive behavior helps your toddler during mealtimes. If you only react when they refuse to eat food or throw food on the ground, then they’ll be more likely to choose that behavior to get more attention.
She also says that cutting down on snacks between meal times and only giving planned snacks or water is important with toddlers.
Research from the Netherlands showed that increasing physical activity in between meal times can also have a positive impact, so make sure your child gets exercise during the day. By running around a play area, they’ll use up more energy, and they’ll be hungrier when it comes time to sit down for a meal.
A lot of research has shown that parents’ food preferences are linked to their children’s food preferences. Jacqueline Borah-Giddens and Grace Falciglia from the University of Cincinnati wrote that children may need to be exposed to new foods more than 10 times before they try them. And in order to encourage them to enjoy a wide range of foods, we should model it ourselves as parents by eating a range of healthy foods ourselves.
When you prepare meals together, it increases the chances that your child will want to taste what they made. So you can try having them measure, pour, or stir something into the dish.
There was a study by Betty Carruth and Jean Skinner at the University of Tennessee about the picky eater phenomenon, and one of the takeaways was that mothers who showed they didn’t want to try new food also had children who tended to refuse new foods. So if your children see you being a picky eater, then they’re more likely to pick up this behavior as well.
Unfortunately, forcing your child to eat is not something you should do because there’s some research that shows that they usually will eat less. It also teaches them that they should rely on someone else to tell them when and how much to eat. Since you want them to build healthy eating habits and good self-esteem, it can be counterproductive. Research from the University of Queensland actually concluded that forcing children to eat can make their picky eating behavior worse.
Lastly, Leann Birch, a developmental psychologist at the University of Illinois, said that you focus on what your child ate over the course of the week, instead of individual days. So if they’ve barely eaten anything today, most likely they had other days where they ate most or all of their meal.
In fact, Birch says that if you try to ignore their natural feeling of being full, then you may impact their ability to tell when they’re full in the future, which could potentially lead to overeating.
That’s it for this Q&A episode. If you have a question to ask, just record a short message on your phone with your name, city, and question. Then email it to hello@parents.club.
I’m Vincent Phamvan. We’ll see you next time.
Question: My son is two and a half years old and he’s started really hating his high chair and just yells a lot during meal times. What can I do to help him eat or stop yelling as much?
Answer: That’s a really great question about toddler tantrums during mealtime, my wife and I are definitely experiencing this with our daughter Lily as well.
Dr. Bernard-Bonnin from the University of Montreal, who specializes in pediatrics, said that ignoring negative mealtime behaviors like tantrums and throwing food, and instead of praising positive behavior helps your toddler during mealtimes. If you only react when they refuse to eat food or throw food on the ground, then they’ll be more likely to choose that behavior to get more attention.
She also says that cutting down on snacks between meal times and only giving planned snacks or water is important with toddlers.
Research from the Netherlands showed that increasing physical activity in between meal times can also have a positive impact, so make sure your child gets exercise during the day. By running around a play area, they’ll use up more energy, and they’ll be hungrier when it comes time to sit down for a meal.
A lot of research has shown that parents’ food preferences are linked to their children’s food preferences. Jacqueline Borah-Giddens and Grace Falciglia from the University of Cincinnati wrote that children may need to be exposed to new foods more than 10 times before they try them. And in order to encourage them to enjoy a wide range of foods, we should model it ourselves as parents by eating a range of healthy foods ourselves.
When you prepare meals together, it increases the chances that your child will want to taste what they made. So you can try having them measure, pour, or stir something into the dish.
There was a study by Betty Carruth and Jean Skinner at the University of Tennessee about the picky eater phenomenon, and one of the takeaways was that mothers who showed they didn’t want to try new food also had children who tended to refuse new foods. So if your children see you being a picky eater, then they’re more likely to pick up this behavior as well.
Unfortunately, forcing your child to eat is not something you should do because there’s some research that shows that they usually will eat less. It also teaches them that they should rely on someone else to tell them when and how much to eat. Since you want them to build healthy eating habits and good self-esteem, it can be counterproductive. Research from the University of Queensland actually concluded that forcing children to eat can make their picky eating behavior worse.
Lastly, Leann Birch, a developmental psychologist at the University of Illinois, said that you focus on what your child ate over the course of the week, instead of individual days. So if they’ve barely eaten anything today, most likely they had other days where they ate most or all of their meal.
In fact, Birch says that if you try to ignore their natural feeling of being full, then you may impact their ability to tell when they’re full in the future, which could potentially lead to overeating.
